Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

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Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

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Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

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A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

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There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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What's black and white and red all over? An embarrassed skunk.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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