Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

pedophile

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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