What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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Wumbo

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops