hi

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

96

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops