whats small and sexually confused? YOu

whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

What do you call a blond reading a book? A blond reading a book.

How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

your sister has 1 boob thats funny

a. why? b. because

What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

A terrorist gets on a plane. He has a pleasant flight and gets off in a new country.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Keep talking shit bitch, and I'll come for you!

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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