Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

France had one revolution

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than having that Holocaust joke be the best anti-joke for months? Windows updates

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A cat playing laser tag.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Pants and God shorts: God: Jews ur my people nao! Jews: Yay we are Gods chosen people! Riches and gRape awaits us! World domination next! God: Well, not quite what I meant but, err... Close enough? Jews: YAY! Moral: So much for "the chosen ones" :(

thumb_up thumb_down -13

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops