why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

did you hear about the argument between jamie jacob and dylan? daniel killed them all

Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

What's more easier to break than a thin stick? A woman's neck.

What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

A blind man walks into a wall.

Someone told me once, but i had terrible memory so I had them tell me again.

a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

A hill billy went fishing

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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