*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Arrow to the Knee

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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123457

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Jesus wept.

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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