What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

thumb_up thumb_down

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the purse kill a circus yeast? Secks

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

thumb_up thumb_down

A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

thumb_up thumb_down

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Keep talking shit bitch, and I'll come for you!

thumb_up thumb_down

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

thumb_up thumb_down

matt has ebola...funny right!?

thumb_up thumb_down

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

thumb_up thumb_down

your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

thumb_up thumb_down

Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your a bus driver, at the first stop, 4 people get on. At the second stop, 2 people get off. At the third stop, 7 people get off. At the fourth stop, everyone gets off. What is the bus drivers name?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down

a black guy hates chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down

A drunk guy walks into a car

thumb_up thumb_down

What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down

I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops