Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +50

I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops