Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

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How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

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Why is meth so addicting? Why? Hang on, i gotta go do some meth

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Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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what's brown and sticky A stick!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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