What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Yee

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops