Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

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If life throws you fried chicken your probably black

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Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

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A father had three children Rose Daisy and Cinderblock. Rose comes up to her father and asks"daddy why am i named Rose?' the father answered"well when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head"Rose Reply's "oh thats nice" and walk's away. the Daisy comes up and ask's "Daddy! why am i named Daisy!" the Dad answered "well. when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head" Daisy Replied" oh ok i guess" and walked away. Then Cinderblock came up and asked "duuuhhhd" and the father simply replied" Shut up Cinderblock".

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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How do u make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? Because that would be assault, and not only assault but aggravated assault, since you are using a weapon to do it. Plus, the lawyer would have an advantage over you in court during the trial, due to having a law degree.

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A paraplegic women falls off a boat. Regardless of the fact that she was wearing a properly inflated flotation device, she still managed to drown. She died instantly, the next day.

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What did the captcha tell me to write? Tepsyto Dora

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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