How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

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What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

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A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

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whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

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ANTONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he suffered severe blood loss and is most likely dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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