Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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BUT HWY?

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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The white guy did it!

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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