What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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A fat man on a moped

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops