Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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People...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven liked to eat numbers lower than itself.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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Major League Soccer

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A Black guy and a Mexican guy walk into the bar. The bar tender offers to buy them a round of drinks because he can tell they had a hard day at the office.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops