The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Hi

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops