It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

--IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!! --no it isn't. a clock only has numbers 1-12 for hours and 1-60 for minutes. "peanut butter jelly" is not in any of those number sets. what are you taking about?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, violets are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A train conducter conducts at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph, if he goes under 2 bridges and over 3 hills what did the conductors mother have for dinner that night. Nothing she was raped then promptly murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he’d rather be road kill, than be in the KFC right across the street,inside a kids meal,dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do owls and cars have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's up with airplane food? Well I am a big fan of peanuts, so nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops