Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

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lebron

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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Rich merchant started build a new bigger home for his family. He bought good blueprints and hired some construction workers to build it up. It took 2 years for the house to finish. Just few days before moving in, he had an horrible nightmare where little green men set the house on fire. When he woke up, he heard the bad news. House was burned down during the night. Merchant was shocked and sad. After couple of weeks, he decided to build a new house. This time a smaller one. Again he bought blueprints and hired people to work for him. Almost a year later, the house was starting to be finished. And again he saw that nightmare of little green men burning the house down. At morning he already knew the news and started to investigate these happenings. Local police officer couldn't help him and so didn't anyone else he asked. Merchant decided to try once more to build new home. This time he had money only for a small farmhouse. Building it up last 6 months, and almost every night merchant was guarding the construction site for little green men. Farmhouse finished in time and merchant moved in. In couple weeks he started to relax and think that little green men stopped harassing him. At one night, couple of months after moving in. Merchant saw the nightmare again, and woke up in burning house. He escaped from the window and saved his wife and children. Then he ran to the village to call for help. The next morning, merchant was sitting next to his burned home and just thinking the motives for green men, what did he do in past so that green men were angry at him? Some villagers had come to watch the burned house and merchant saw something green in middle of the crowd. He slowly walked towards the crowd and saw this little man fleeing. He started to pursue this man and was pumped with adrealine. Didn't last long when merchant catched this little guy and held him in the ground to ask "Who are you? Do you have anything to do with those housefires?" The little green man was calm and relaxed as he answered "No."

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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What's yellow and dangerous? China.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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