Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

acuna

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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