Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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FIRE!!

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops