What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

Chuck Norris can watch TV.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

Hello, nice to meet you.

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

The white guy did it!

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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