what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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