So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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Jimmy has nine bags of sugar. He eats nine bags of sugar. What doeshe have now? Diabetes

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I literally died laughing

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

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How do you stop a car from hitting a kid? You don't.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

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This is not a joke.... It is mind rape.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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Whats green? The color green.

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who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

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Why did the boy stop working on a farm? His country became more economically developed.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

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What did one orphan say to the other? 'Robin get in the car!'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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