Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

hrih

26.5% of Americans are obese.

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

1134

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

You.

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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