A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

Why? Because racecar.

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

The Holocaust

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

Hello, nice to meet you.

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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