What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

A man walks around a bar.

So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

what happened to the guy that got attacked by a shark he died

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

acuna

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

Knock, Knock. Come in.

What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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