How do you make a doctor cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

You mothers so ghetto, you died.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Can you help jack Off. The elephant?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i am a dino. RAWR.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man went to the doctor. He had experienced some strong abdominal pain. The doctor looked at him and ordered some tests to be done. He had a kidney stone. The day after he passed the stone, he got ran over by a bus. The man's name was Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops