what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? Doctor! Doctor who? exactly.. how did you know?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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what's the difference between a crocodile?

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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What did the rabbi say to the bartender? Hi, Mark!

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What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Why did little Betsy have a stomach ache? Her alcoholic mother pinned her down in a drunken rage and made her drink bleach.

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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