What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

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P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

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Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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Why was the leaf green? Chlorophyll

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You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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Why dd the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She lost her arms to cancer.

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

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how did the cat call 9-1-1? very carefully as cats do not have opposable thumbs, making the whole situation rare, and semi-improbable.

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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hi dave

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look under under where under under where. under the couch

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How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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Do you work at subway? Because you are giving me a footlong. Yes, please, on white bread, with turkey, ham, white cheddar, and all of the vegetables. Maybe a little bit of sweet onion sauce and sub sauce. Sure, that will be a combo with chips. Thank you very much.

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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