Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

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Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

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What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

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That awkward moment when Amish mingle has a member

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Q. What is the difference between Jesus and and a picture of Jesus? A. It takes one nail to hang the picture Not trying to offend anyone just a joke to be clear

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Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

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A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

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a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

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roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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