roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

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What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

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black people

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't the farmer shot him before he could have a chance at freedom.

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why did the T-Rex eat the other dinosaur? Because it is a carnivorous animal.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

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A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

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Stop Iran! We need the money.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? -absolut vodka Well, you have a sirious drinking problem...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops