What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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what is darker than black?... YOU

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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The white guy did it!

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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