There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin mobile XD

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Q: What's worse than one dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? A: One dead baby in ten trash cans.

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Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

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A Bull walks into a bar. it killed three people by the fact it was a Bull

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A seal walks into a club.

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You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

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what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

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How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

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What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops