How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops