Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

Oh look, I've found my knife

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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