girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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