Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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Why did the sperm swim back? cos he realised that he was in someones anus!

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A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

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I want seaman but sex with interracial men body builders. Please call me - 843-813-2788

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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