Hey Tim lets think of a joke

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

Runescape.

A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

America Votes

Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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