What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What did the athiest get for christmas? Well he shouldn't get anything becuase he doesn't belive in jesus.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

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Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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how many high school boys does it take to change a light bulb?? idk the light bulb in my bathroom is out and i need to know how many boys to call over to fix it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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