How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

What happens if George Washington is still alive? World population increases by 1

Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

A muslim walks into a airport. He then boards his flight and is flown to his destination.

What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

Who did the dinosuar, that's pretty fricken awesome!

Why did Timmy stay home on the day of the big test at the public school? He was homeschooled

Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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