Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

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What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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Blah blah something about Ryan Dunn.

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Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

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Knock Knock Who's there The Holocaust!

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"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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