A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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whats black. an african american person

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womens sports...

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Wumbo

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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