A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

The Holocaust

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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