What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

The white guy did it!

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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