Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

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Dick Chaney

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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1134

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops