What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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