Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

what the hell happened to your face

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

your momma's so stupid she shot herself

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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