Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, the sky is grey so is the grass everything is grey, as i am colourblind

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops