A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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